My name is Andrea.
I am a lifelong learner who is passionate about growing in every way that I can.
I'm good at planning,organizing and analyzing.
These skills got me through being depleted emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically.
Over the years as life pushed me through transitions and other life experiences I was not making sure I stayed true to myself. I was still living life based on expectations I had set over 2 decades ago!
I was exhausted, frustrated, confused, angry, sad, scared and so much more. I no longer bounded out of bed. I was not excited to live my own life.
I was not depressed, I was stuck in a life that I was no longer a part of. The real me just followed along with the me who had let life lead the way.
I knew something had to change.
I had to be in more proactive in my life. I had to be excited to get up.
So I began to accumulate tools to help me deal with the depletion on all four levels. Using what I was good at I studied and practiced many different ways to help me find myself.
I finally decided it was time to make it my career to help other people find themselves - and get ready to jump out of bed.
How did I end up not liking my own life?
After a few decades of what felt like almost constant transition, my lack of dealing with emotions and not living for me was catching up.
I was just not happy. I did everything for everyone else. I thought I was taking care of me by doing the self-care practices every guru told me I should do.
Massages, pedicures, working out - you name it I did it.
But none of it helped for more than about an hour.
Fast forward a few years, and I finally figured out the problem.
I was not living for me. I no longer even knew who I was.
While I could end here and hope you could trust me on my journey, I want to share with you some of what I went through so you can trust I have been where you are or at least close!
Like most people I began accumulating emotional baggage in childhood. While we don't realize it in the moment, most everything has lasting impact on us - impacting our happiness.
My childhood issues include: my parents getting divorced, moving cities multiple times, new step-parents, and losing a cousin to leukemia. Not to mention the basic stuff like growing up.
After graduating college I moved to Omaha, Nebraska and moved in with my boyfriend.
Within eight months of moving I started graduate school while working a time consuming corporate finance job.
After finishing a couple semesters my boyfriend and I got engaged. I then put graduate school and my career on hold and moved to a foreign country.
This was not long periods of time between each. Got engaged December 31, married in July. Got married on a Saturday and flew to Australia on Monday!
I then experienced for the first time not working for more than a week. I had been working since I was 14 and I was now 26.
That was the hardest part of that transition series - nothing to "do" in a foreign country while your new spouse was at work. Pure torture for a Type A, I have goals get out of my way person.
Wish I had the forethought to start working on childhood emotions then!
After 2 years of living in Australia. We returned back to Omaha where within 4 months we purchased our first home and I started my first business (event planning - using those organizing and planning skills).
After a couple of years we had our son. It was a hard delivery and I ended up hemorrhaging a lot of blood. So while adapting to having my first child, I was running a business and trying to recover from the birth
I really should not be here - so at least there were miracles in the chaos.
Then a family member had their first major episode of mental illness and addiction, with a direct impact on me. (There were issues before, but this was the first in a series of problems that would trigger rehab.) This all happened 2 days after getting home from the hospital.
Evidently my Guardian Angels think I can handle A LOT of stuff at once! 🙂
Also I was struggling with my own postpartum depression. And looking back on it this is actually when our first wave of marital problems began, so I was dealing with that.
After about a year of my son being alive, I closed my first business. (Too much work to take care of a toddler and 8 brides!)
This was also the first time that I began using the time to grow personally. There was so much emotional pain I had to start to even survive.
When my son was 5 we moved to Houston, Texas after we had just built a house in Omaha (At least I enjoyed it for 6 months). Two years after moving to Houston we moved to Dallas.
Within four years we moved a minimum of one time a year. From one house to an apartment, to a house, to an apartment, to a house, to another apartment to a house. All while running a business, managing daily life and raising my son.
Our marriage began to take a hard hit in Dallas. Eventually I left my husband because I felt there was no more that I could do.
During this most recent series of transitions I went through:
At this point I am wondering if my Angels are just messing with me! 🙂
All through my life I also struggled with religion, spirituality and how it all worked. My opinion and faith faltered often and was strong often.
But really it never felt completely right. I was forcing it to be right, just like I forced many of the other areas of my life to be right.
To fit what everyone wanted it to be. To fit the perfect mold.
In July of 2016 when I left my husband I finally decided it was time to find out what I wanted my life to be.
I have begun to understand myself better than I ever have. I have healed many hurts and negative beliefs. I also now know exactly what I want and am actively working the plan.
I can honestly say today, I am happy, excited and living the life I want to live.
Andrea Travillian is an emotional healing coach. She helps clients break free of making the same mistakes over again. She has her MBA and undergraduate in finance and her coaching certificate. She is an author, speaker, and most importantly mom.